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Back in my day, a killer dating profile was a Myspace page with a moving .gif background and perfectly curated “Zoolander” quotes. A thirst trap was setting your AOL instant messenger status to the lyrics of your crush’s favorite Snow Patrol song, and typing “a/s/l”? into a Neopets chatroom was the closest thing to letting a stranger know you may be “dtf” (Or down to … you know).
When I found myself newly single after college and living in the big city, a friend told me to download Blendr — the “Grindr for straight people” with her. We were very hush-hush about it, because it was 2012 and online dating still had a big social stigma attached: namely, that it was for wanton people with unwholesome intentions.
Thank goodness, we’ve come a long way, baby. The social stigma of app dating has dissipated, and with the incredible boom of social media and the smartphone, online dating is now not only socially acceptable, it’s the norm. And there are over 1500 apps and websites out there looking to set you up.
With so many options, where do you even begin? Here are some lists, based on what you may be looking for, with a breakdown of what each app can offer below.
Best Free Dating Apps
Best Dating Apps for Relationships
Best Lesbian Dating Apps
Best Gay Dating Apps
Best Christian Dating Apps
Best Jewish Dating Apps
Best Dating app for over 40+
There’s no way you’re surprised to see Tinder on this list. As the behemoth of the dating app world (literally the reason that “swipe right” has become part of everyday language) Tinder is the leader of the pack in terms of popularity, and has been for years. It provides a mixed bag: Tinder doesn’t separate the hookup-seekers from those who want more serious relationships. But when it comes to the quantity of potential matches, Tinder cannot be beat. If you want to get your noodle wet, sometimes you have to throw a lot of spaghetti at the wall, and Tinder has all the spaghetti.
Notice that eHarmony is on several of our “best dating app for [blank]” lists? That’s with good reason — While it’s lack of “swipes” or social media novelty may make it feel a little old-fashioned, when it comes to making a serious and lasting connection, eHarmony’s numbers speak for themselves: Research published by the National Academy of Sciences shows that eHarmony ranks first in creating online marriages than any other online site. It also states that couples that meet through eHarmony are significantly less likely to break up than couples who met through any other online method.
Founded in 1995, Mach.com is maybe the OG dating site -they basically laid the original blueprints for what a dating site should be. Their layout doesn’t seem to have changed much in the last couple of years — but hey, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. Match.com is so confident in their skills that they offer a guarantee: if you don’t find someone special to date within 6 months, you’ll get the next 6 months of your subscription for free. That’s the kind of cocky arrogance I can get behind, though the rules are somewhat complicated.
To be completely honest, I don’t love the idea of Mark Zuckerberg having anything to do with picking my romantic partners (though it is totally a reality tv show I would watch!), but Facebook Dating is one of the only truly free dating applications out there — there are no “extra” or “premium” features hidden behind a paywall or subscription. And it pulls info from your Facebook Profile, so it’s easy to setup, plus it has a super cute “secret crush” feature that’s worth checking out. It has a smaller user base (for now) so if you’re looking for quantity you might want to stick to something like Tinder. But Facebook Dating is already built right into facebook mobile, so odds are you already have it on your phone, meaning you don’t have to download a new app, so… may as well try it out, right? Find a breakdown here.
Personally speaking, Hinge is currently on my personal blacklist, because years ago after a painful breakup it sent me a recommendation email for a date… with my very recent ex-boyfriend. To be fair, Hinge didn’t know! Annoyances at having my ex’s stupid handsome face grin at me from the screen aside, I have to begrudgingly admit that Hinge’s algorithm clearly understands my type.
Hinge is also a great alternative to other apps because it stalwartly refused to jump on the swipe wagon. There’s no waiting for someone to match with you: you can immediately comment on or “like” an aspect of a person’s profile. I do find though, that because I’m unwilling to pay for a Preferred Membership subscription, I run out matches quickly on a given day. So be intentional, and save the mindless swiping for Tinder (remember: there’s no reason you have to pick just one app).
While online dating can suck for everyone, we know it’s scarier for women, right? Do I even have to say it at this point? Lauded as “feminist Tinder”, Bumble’s goal is to empower all users to create safe and healthy connections. And it does this by forcing the women to make the first move, empowering them to control the conversation.
Bumble is nipping at Tinder’s heels when it comes to sheer number of dating app downloads, and more users = more potential matches. You can also filter matches by all different categories: religion, political leanings, even pet preferences and astrological signs. I’ve personally had more successful dates come from Bumble than any other platform, but I’ve also had a guy ask for feet pics and then block me — so you win some, you lose some.
Until recently, I thought OkCupid was a thing of the past. Their most recent ad-campaign “For every single person” convinced me I was so, so very wrong: OkCupid is geared towards helping users be specific and find exactly what they’re looking for, which is why it crosses over onto so many of our Best lists.
It’s been described as the “dating site version of a left-wing hipster who wears ‘Make America Gay Again’ hats”. It involves a relatively lengthy application-process, with a lot of questions to fill out, but it makes it a fun experience, like taking an online quiz. OkCupid is like an ice cream bar with every conceivable flavor of ice cream, making it a great place for those who know exactly what flavor they want —no matter how niche it may be.
True story: Plenty of Fish is how my sister met her now-husband! So… it works! Another true story: they’re now getting divorced, but hey, that’s not Plenty of Fish’s fault.
Plenty of Fish is one of the most immediately usable dating apps: it doesn’t require a premium paid upgrade for you to enjoy most of the benefits. Specifically, thanks to its free messaging services, it focuses on conversation. One thing to note, however: you cannot filter people based on location, so this is not the app if you’re looking to send an eggplant emoji and a 1:00 a.m. “U up?” text.
Why does casual dating have to be synonymous with hookups and one-night stands? As a single woman in NYC, sometimes it feels like my romantic pursuits are shoved into one of two categories: I’m either forced to be the type of woman who is seeking a soul mate, dreaming of my wedding day, or I’m a sexy independent one-night-stand-loving kinda gal, perfecting my Stride of Pride (I don’t believe in the term “walk of shame”) every weekend.
Coffee Meets Bagel takes all the pressure off, keeping dating casual but without the immediate unspoken “so…are we gonna bang or what?” feeling sneaking in. CMB keeps dating casual, but meaningful.
No, I’m not talking about “that funny fantasy football show starring the dude who got in trouble for lying about 9/11.” I mean the dating app that’s gotten flack for being “elitist Tinder”.
As a modern dating-app-savvy woman who has been ghosted by enough flaky dudes saying something to the effect of “I dunno, I’m just like, working stuff out…”, I have to say that I do respect the League’s Mission to maintain a selective and high-quality dating and social networking community. And as the bad-ass, ambitious bish that I am, I’ve been told that I can be “intimidating.” So a platform that seeks to pair me with men who know what they’re signing up for is appealing. That is, if my application were to be approved.
Proudly claiming the title of “First Dating app for queer people of all genders,” Thurst has a strong emphasis on safety and privacy: they don’t connect to social networks, and do not share user data. Strict community guidelines let you know that all gender identities and sexual orientations are welcome here -and all users have to be on board with that. At least one review calls this app quite literally “life-saving”.
Qutie
Founded out of a frustration with the usual dating scene, Qutie is designed to help members of the LGBTQ community find meaningful connections. A fun, unique feature of this app is that users can send 10-second video clips to one another, reassuring you that you aren’t being catfished.
Part dating app, part social-media platform, HER is award-winning, has a rating of 4.4 stars on the app store, and millions of users worldwide. HER was created by and for queer women, and focuses on creating communities both online and in real life. They even host queer events for those people who aren’t quite comfortable with a one-on-one meeting just yet.
(Don’t let the name confuse you: this app won’t put Scarlett Johansen in your pocket)
I’m dating myself when I say “I remember when Feeld was called 3nder (thrinder).” Originally designed specifically for finding willing participants for a threesome, Feeld is “a place where you can explore your relationships and find your humans.” Feeld has expanded to cater to all types of judgment-free arrangements, with an emphasis on kink and polyamory. On feeld, you can ask someone what they’re into, and they’ll tell you. One of the best summaries I’ve seen to capture the vibe: On Feeld you can “be open, not exposed”.
In case it hasn’t become incredibly clear by now, I’m a (mostly) straight woman, so I can’t honestly speak much to dating apps for gay men. However, everyone has heard of Grindr, and this report shows it has just under 4 million daily users. Also, I’d just like to add that even though Grindr is known primarily as a hook-up app, two of my best friends met on Grindr for a sexy hookup over 10 years ago and they’ve been together (now happily married!) ever since. So, you never know where you might find love.
Once again, straight female here, so take my thoughts on these sites with a big ol’ pinch of salt: Adam4Adam (often shortened to A4A) has been about for 19 years now, so it can be considered a pioneer in the world of gay social networking. Pros: you can try the service and send messages for free, and there’s a wide user database. Cons: Conversations that are inactive for more than 10 days get deleted, and there are fewer features when using the mobile app.
My mother always told me that it was important to pick a partner who played by the same rules in life that I did. This sentiment is especially important when it comes to one’s Faith.
Christian Mingle is a dating website specifically designed for, you guessed it, Christians! With over 15 million members, Christian mingle has the highest number of Christian members on any dating site globally.
If you aren’t ready to pay for Christian Mingle, Christian Cafe might be a good starting point for you. With a 10 day “try before you buy” policy (the only place that policy applies in Christian dating, wink wink nudge nudge), Christian Cafe boasts over 25,000 marriages as a result of their site.
Catholic Match’s mission is to help you find your forever love: someone who shares your values and desires a Sacramental marriage. If you’re a Catholic, you know why that’s important: and Catholic Match boasts an impressive number of success stories. Their website also has a charming selection of articles designed to help guide you through the online dating process.
I was a little horrified when I turned 30 to notice a distinct change in the number of matches I got on certain swipe-based dating apps. In hindsight, it’s a blessing — I don’t WANT to date anyone that’s immature enough to get hung up on a number like that. But unfortunately, the stigma against age (especially for women) is real. So I cannot imagine how escalated that becomes if you fall into the 50+ category. Silver Singles is here to help mitigate any of that: The platform connects people based on their interests and passions, an approach that yields results.
Growing up in Australia, Fiddler on the Roof was my primary introduction to Jewish Culture. As a result, I automatically assumed that a website designed to help Jewish singles find love (“Matchmaker Matchmaker, make me a match!”) is very good at what it sets out to do. My bias was confirmed: the numbers speak for themselves! With almost 15,000 new sign ups per month, the highest number of Jewish members of any dating site around the world, JDate has been successfully matching people in the Jewish community for 20 years.
Whether you’re after for true love, a casual fling, no-strings-attached group sex or a meaningful friend in a new community… or all of the above or something in between -hopefully this list helps find what you’re looking for. The whole hyper-connected world of dating is literally at your fingertips, and this is just the tip of the iceberg. Good luck!
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